I often feel as tense as a wound-up clock after work. My shoulders grow tense, breathing becomes rapid and shallow. Usually, the sound of my laptop lid slamming shut used to lead to the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, wine poured quickly into a glass, that initial sip marking the end of the workday.
Then, several months back, I came across my now-adult son’s old school recorder up in the loft. I idly blew into it, immediately transported back to the days when it drove me crazy – his daily practice a violent assault on my eardrums, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head hours after he had gone to bed.
But rather than consigning it to the bin, I took it down, along with a book – Very Easy Recorder Tunes. Growing up, I had no musical talent whatsoever. I’d had recorder lessons at infant school, yet never got to try other instruments.
Searching online for recorder tutorials, I watched dozens of YouTube videos aimed at children, and got a fingering guide on paper. I searched “easiest recorder tunes”, I felt excited when I played a recognizable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Yes, a typical young child could learn it quickly, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it felt like a huge achievement.
My son questioned my actions (and begged me to quit), but I kept going – I enjoyed the sensation the recorder gave me. My inability to remember anything meant I had to concentrate on the sheet of paper in front of me, and painstakingly copy the finger positions. My breathing slowed down, I was focused, and after nailing that initial shaky melody, I felt euphoric. I had managed to play music.
Today, several months later, I can “play” other nursery rhymes and a passable Ode to Joy. Yes, my timing is rubbish, and I must jot down note names, but for me, it’s not about skill or being a musician – it’s purely about the joy it provides and how it clears my mind while playing.
I learned that few kids play the recorder today, which probably relieves parents, yet it made me wistful for my school years, as well as my son’s.
I make it a habit to play each night after work before I do anything else, and during those 20 minutes, I escape into my own realm. Afterward, I feel totally energised and uplifted.
My friends find it amusing, but one very wise therapist friend told me I was not only lowering my stress levels, but improving my cognitive skills, such as memory and auditory processing, which is invaluable at my time of life. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s a real “ode to joy” indeed.
